“Get some clothes on jaweee, see all the chest hair sef,” she said and hissed.
“Listen to yourself, you didn’t notice my packs, na only the hair you see?” he asked while settling beside her on the settee.
“That’s because it’s disgusting.”
“Yeah right, headlines sis, girls totally dig this, the hair, the packs, the face, the voice, everything,” he said while using his hands to demonstrate.
Princess laughed, “wait so you think you are handsome abiii? Uncle Chimezie beats you to it.”
Both started laughing, the face of their uncle was enough to send a new born baby back to his mother’s womb.
The man had a big head, he was bald, had hairs in both ears, had a moustache and beard with three different colours; black, white, grey. To worsen matters, he had a very huge nose and was lacking in the height department.
“Princess chai! Why are you insulting uncle now?” Chuks asked while still laughing.
“I didn’t say anything, simply said he is handsomer.”
“If I hear, with that nose which occupies almost two-third of his face.”
“Ah! Chuks, let daddy come back, I’ll report you.” she replied. She had forgotten about the movie she had been watching, she took the remote and switched the television off.
“Why?” Chuks inquired.
“Its boring jaweee,” she turned towards his direction wearing the expression of a sober professional, “so you came for your phone right?” she asked.
“Madam, whats with the look?”
She raised her eyebrows, “you need your phone or what?”
“Sorry Ma, I do,” Chuks replied while trying to hide his smile.
“So you just want me to give you, you don’t even care how much stress I went through sef.”
“What even happened?” he asked, he was on his way home when he discovered he could not find his phone. He had dialled his number from a call centre only for Princess to pick.
“You want to know?” Princess asked, “Okay I’ll tell you.”
“Last class, I instructed you all to write an article on self-ionization of water but some dumb students simply copied the entire article from wikipedia.” The lecturer stopped and brought out a folded piece of paper from his folder.
“Who is Jembete Poyinmaya?” He asked with a stern look on his face. The entire class broke into laughter.
Ore nudged Dami, “what’s wrong?” he asked, “everybody is laughing and you are wearing a look that is only found in funerals.”
She hissed out of frustration, “I’m just tired, thanks for your concern though.”
“Order.” Professor Jakeilaye shouted, “why are you acting like animals, I asked a question and all I get as a reply is laughter and silly murmurings.”
“Class governor,” he continued, “come with whoever this person is to my office. I want to know who is so silly as to dub from wikipedia and even include wikipedia’s references and external links, as if that wasn’t silly enough. The i.diot equally wrote ‘Read in another language’ in his article.”
The students laughed silently, no body wanted to be the scape goat, they would rather prefer Jembe receiving his punishment. The guy was synonymous with trouble and stupidity.
Dami hissed, “Read in another language? Like seriously?” she laughed.
“Do you realise you’ve been hissing too much?” Ore asked.
The sound of students packing their bags and exiting the class disrupted their discussion.
“I think the lecturer already left, I didn’t even notice.” Dami said while putting her pen in her bag.
“That’s because you have something bothering you, mind sharing?” he asked with obvious concern etched on his face.
“Awww, somebody is being a good friend, thanks but I’m fine. Okay I’m not really fine but I’ll be.”
Ore gave her a ‘are you sure’ look.
They stood and walked out of the lecture theatre.
On the way to their hostels, Ore kept trying to bring up conversations but gave up when he realised he was fighting a losing battle.
When Dami got to her room, she lay on her bed thinking of a way to solve her predicament.
There was only one name which came to mind, Tinu.